Contributions aren’t just for tax season

I have unexpectedly found myself in the role of event/outing organizer, and after years of sitting in the increasingly hot water, it has now reached a boiling point. Luckily (or unluckily), I’ve noticed, unlike the proverbial frog.

If you know me, I’ve never considered myself the life of the party. I’ve never considered myself someone to whom others would look as far as social ideas, events, new things to try, or anything of that sort. I’ve never considered myself “in the know” on things to do. That’s all way too hip for me. And I’m not hip, I’m not “in,” I’m not cool, and I’m not a planner. BUT surprise! Here I’ve been for the last several years, finding tickets to this or that, picking out museums, hikes, trips, hearing about deals, and saying “hey, let’s go shooting,” or “hey, there’s this nice park over here.” Things haven’t really been boring. There’s always something new to try and there are always the old stand bys, too. Don’t get me wrong, I’m incredibly grateful that I have people in my life willing to do these things with me, but I am so tired, really tired of finding them. I miss being introduced to new things and being exposed to things that maybe I wouldn’t have looked into otherwise. I feel like my own personal development hasn’t progressed as much as it could have, while others have found new things that they like due to my suggestions. I feel like I should feel proud of my contribution, but instead, I just feel tired and stagnant.

I think one of the reasons I enjoyed a recent trip to Texas so much was that I didn’t have to plan anything once I met up with my friend. No, it wasn’t always what I wanted to do; there were places that I’d rather not have gone to, but it was so nice and so relaxing to not be the one suggesting things. I know that it definitely played a huge role in coming back as refreshed as I did. The impact was so powerful and unexpected.

Now, I’m in a fix. I don’t want to suggest anything. I don’t care that much anymore, except that I do. If I stop though, then something must be wrong. If I do things on my own, then why didn’t I invite others. There’s not really a good way to win.

In terms of being a person, my challenge to you is to create a balance in your relationships and friendships, to give as much as you get, to find new things that the other person would like, to give credit where credit is due if a friend has introduced you to a new hobby or place, and to have partnerships. ♫ Take the wheel and drive sometimes. ♫ 

As with all of the topics discussed here, I hate that this is something that needs to be pointed out. I feel like it should go without saying, and it almost discredits any improvement because it had to be mentioned. But progress is progress. I know that part of my own issue is letting go of the reins (another topic that I hope to discuss in the future).

  

*I’d like to tie in this post to an upcoming post about taking credit. I have a maybe irrationally frustrated reaction to those who trumpet their interests in things that I’ve introduced them to. I make a point to give credit where credit is due, and I get almost hurt when that same credit isn’t given to me. I always say “Oh yeah! I love _________. I’m so grateful that so-and-so got me into it!” instead of “oh yeah, I love ____________ (even though I’d never tried it until so-and-so.) I sound so much cooler if I say I like this thing. Man, I’m awesome.” Or with work things. All to be expounded upon in later posts!